Hurt
by vjd
Summary: Edward has done something that has truley hurt Bella deeply. How will Bella react? How will Edward try to fix things? Review plz!
1. Chapter 1

"Edward…" I whispered softly as my right hand drifted across his chest. His lips met mine and as we kissed my hand slowly drifted down to his abdomen tracing his muscular stomach. I heard him let out a low moan as my other hand reached up and caressed the back of his neck.

Suddenly I felt him grab my upper arms and push me away roughly. I looked at him confused as to what I had done wrong. He was looking at me with anger and disapproval in his eyes. His expression made me nervous.

"Bella…" His voice seethed with disapproval. "We've been over this. You know where the boundaries are. Why do you always insist on pushing them?" He almost growled his last sentence at me. I was too shocked and hurt to say anything. He had never talked to me like this before. I knew that I had crossed the line with his boundaries, for they were his not mine. He didn't even discuss them with me before he set them. I had crossed the line many times, but he had never gotten this upset with me before. He let go of my arms after a few minutes of silence. I was still in shock. He shook his head angrily and mumbled something to himself. I couldn't make out everything he said but I did hear immature and childish. As soon as those words left his mouth I felt like I had been slapped in the face. I could feel the hurt as it ripped through my chest. How could he say such things about me? Did he really think I was immature and childish? I quickly turned my back to him closing my eyes and laid my head on my pillow. I did not want him to see how he had hurt me. I purposefully lay as far from him as possible. I was too hurt to cuddle tonight. A few seconds later I felt his cold hand softly shake my shoulder.

"Bella." His voice had softened but I could still hear the disapproval from before.

I didn't say anything at first. I knew my voice would portray my emotions and I didn't want him to know how he had hurt me. I wasn't ready for this conversation, not tonight. I finally resigned myself to say something knowing Edward would not leave me alone until I had.

I whispered as softly as I could hiding the hurt I felt, "I'm tired Edward I just want to sleep. Goodnight."

Edward took a deep breath and sighed, "Goodnight Bella." Then in a softer voice, "I love you." I didn't respond. I couldn't. I could feel tears starting to form in my eyes. I desperately tried to fight them off. I would not let him see me cry. I felt him lay down on the bed beside me and I did not make any shift to move closer to him. I stayed on the extreme edge of my bed until sleep eventually found me.

I woke the next morning, not willing, to face the day. I didn't want to face Edward. I was still so hurt from his words the previous night. I could feel him lying next to me, but I refused to move. I felt the bed shift as he repositioned himself and then felt his mouth at my ear.

"Bella, it's time to get up." He whispered softly. I didn't respond. I just lay there with my eyes shut.

"Bella you will be late for school if you don't get up now." I still said nothing. I didn't want to go thought an entire day of school feeling this way. I didn't know how I was going to look him in the eye and not cry. I decided that I would take the chicken's way out and fake being sick. I never stayed home from school. I deserved a day off. This would give me time away from Edward to think, organize my thoughts, and feelings.

Before I could say anything Edward murmured, "Bella about last night I…" I could hear the sadness in his voice but I cut him off before he could continue.

"Is Charlie home?" I said quietly.

"Yes, he is going into work late today." I could hear the confusion in his voice at my question. I got out of bed then and tiredly went to my door. I could feel Edward's eyes on me as I reached the door. Without turning around I whispered to him, "I don't feel well today. I won't be going to school. You go. Please. I want to be alone to rest. You can call me on your lunch hour if you like to check on me, though I will probably be sleeping. I have to go tell Charlie now. Have a good day at school."

"I love you Bella." Edward said sorrowfully. I pretended to not hear him as I opened my door and left.

I didn't want to discuss it with him. I slowly made my way down the stairs to the kitchen. I quietly told Charlie that I was sick and needed him to call the school. He looked concerned and asked if I needed anything. I declined and made my way to the living room to rest on the couch. I didn't want to go to my room right away for fear that Edward would still be there. Before Charlie left he grabbed a blanket from the closet in the hall and placed it over me. Tears fell down my face as I listened to Charlie get into his cruiser and leave the yard. I knew my actions were hurting Edward, and he needed as explanation. I just wasn't ready. I was hurting too much. I could feel my chest ache as I remember his harsh words from the night before. How could he treat me that way? How could he hurt me like this? I cried myself to sleep and didn't wake again until I heard the phone ring.


	2. Chapter 2

Don't own the characters Stephenie Meyer does!

Edwards POV

When the bell finally rang for lunch I ran as fast as I could without, raising suspicion, to my car. I needed to talk to Bella. I knew I had hurt her last night. I wanted to kill myself for what I had said to her. I was out of line. I just needed to talk to her, tell her I was so sorry, and that I would never treat her like that again. I wasn't even mad at her! I was disgusted and angry with myself. Why did I have to be so weak? I would never be able to give Bella the physical relationship she deserved. I was such a selfish creature! Could I not do anything right by her? As soon as I got to my car I dialed her number yearning for the sound of her voice. The phone rang five times and I was just about to hang up and drive over to her house when I heard a very faint voice on the line.

"Hello" Bella's voice was tired and weak.

"Bella. It's Edward are you ok? How are you feeling?" My voice was filled with concern, and I longed to be with her.

"I'm fine. Just tired."

"Do you need anything? I can come over right…" I was interrupted before I could finish my sentence.

"I'm fine. Please stay at school. I just want to sleep, and be alone right now. You can call later tonight and check on me again if you want to. I need to be alone right now"

I was stunned by her reply. She didn't want to see me. I always came over after school; at the very least I was there at night while she slept. I felt a wave of hurt, and confusion go through me. Was I not welcome at her house? Had I hurt her that much that she couldn't be around me?

"Are you sure?" I tried to hide the hurt I felt but my voice sounded sad even to me.

There was a short hesitation before she answered, "Yes" with sorrow in her voice.

I paused briefly wounded by her reply and slowly said, "Bella I…" and then phone went dead.

I sat in my car for a long time staring at the phone in my hand. I felt like I was suffocating. My breathing was coming in short gasps. Of course I didn't need to breath but I couldn't seem to stop. My head was swimming and I wondered if vampires could get migraines. Wave upon wave of hurt and disgust washed over me as I sat in my car. I loathed myself for what I had done. I hurt my angel and there was nothing I could do about it. I swore to always protect her and keep her safe, but who was there to protect her form me? I wanted to see her to beg for her forgiveness, but she didn't want me there. She didn't want to see me.

I played our conversation over and over again in my head. She sounded fragile and so sad. I just wanted to hold her in my arms and take her pain away, the pain I had caused. I had no one to blame but myself. How could I be so heartless? I knew from last night that she was upset. She didn't sleep anywhere near me, and that had hurt, but I thought I would have time in the morning to set things right. My mind was swarming with images from this morning trying to make sense of everything. She never once looked at me this morning. Twice I had told her I loved her and she had acted as if nothing had been said. Was she really sick, or was she just trying to avoid me? My thoughts were abruptly interrupted by a soft knock on the passenger side window. I looked up to see Alice waiting to be let in. I unlocked the door and started the car. I could feel her eyes on me but I didn't turn to face her.

"Where's Bella? Where were you for lunch today?"

"Bella is sick. I came out here to call her to see how she was doing. She's fine, just tired." I said flatly.

"Oh." _That explains what I saw._

I whipped my head around as I heard her thoughts, "What did you see Alice?"

"Well, I saw Bella in bed, she seemed really upset about something, but she was probably just sick." I hung my head and took a deep breath. Bella was upset all right and I was the cause. I felt sick as I watched Alice's vision of Bella in her room flash in my head. I gripped the steering wheel tighter willing Alice to think about something else.

"Have you seen her?"

"No."

"Well I think I will take over some flowers and see how she is doing."

Maybe this was a good thing. Bella could talk to Alice and then I could talk to her and find out how I could fix things.

"Yeah, why don't you. I'm sure Bella will be happy to see you."

I reached our house just then. As soon as I parked my car I raced to my room and shut the door. Alice left right after me to go see Bella. I wanted to be alone to wallow in my misery. Damit, what have I done!?! I slowly made my way to my couch and sat down with my head in my hands. I sat there for a few minutes before I heard a knock on my door.

"What?" I was not in the mood for company. I was surprised by who I say opening the door it was Alice. She was supposed to be at Bella's. What was she doing back so soon? I instantly became fearful and nervous. I froze on the couch waiting.

"Edward, Bella won't see me. She is refusing all company. What's going on?" I could hear the curiosity in her voice and saw genuine concern on her face.

I sighed, "I screwed up Alice. I screwed up big time."

Alice slowly walked over to me with love and sympathy in her eyes. She sat down next to me putting her arm around me.

"She'll forgive you. She loves you. Don't worry."

"I don't know Alice, I don't know." I whispered as I shook my head slowly from side to side.

Alice left my room then, leaving me alone with my thoughts. If Bella was sick I had to make sure she was okay. If she wasn't up to company than I would have Carlisle stop in to check on her. I and to make sure she didn't need anything. I quickly pulled my phone out of my pocket and dialed Carlisle's number.

"Edward, what can I do for you?"

"Carlisle, Bella is sick and I need you to stop by and check on her."

"What's wrong with her, what are her symptoms?" He murmured sounding concerned.

"That's just it. I'm not sure. She won't see me…or anyone…it's a long story, and I don't want to get into it. All I know is that she is really tired and stayed how from school today. She sounded really weak on the phone when I called. I'm worried about her and I just wondered if you would check on her."

"Of course Edward. I will stop by this evening. Don't worry. I'm sure she's fine."

I hung up satisfied that she would be receiving medical attention if needed. I toyed the rest of the afternoon with the idea of calling her again. But I knew I was the last person she wanted to hear from right now and decided to wait to hear from Carlisle first.

It was a very long afternoon.


	3. Chapter 3

I was dangerously close to tears, and hung the phone up before I could break down. I kept hearing Edward's voice in my head. The hurt and pain behind his words. I needed to clear my head and decided to take a shower. I made my way slowly up the stairs and to the bathroom. As I entered the shower my emotions got the best of me, and I fell to the floor of the shower grabbing my knees, heaving great sobs. I sat there until the hot water ran out. Slowly I got to my feet and turned the water off. I dried myself off bit by bit unable to cry any longer and made my way to my bedroom. I changed into sweats and fell onto my bed.

I hated hurting Edward, but I needed time to organize my thoughts. He couldn't treat me like this ever again. I was his equal damit! I was not a child. We needed to make decisions together about our relationship. He needed to treat me like his partner not a baby. He was not my father. Last night he made me feel like he was chastising his daughter not his lover. I knew he had boundaries for a reason, but really couldn't we discuss them? Maybe draw new ones? He always told me that his blood lust out weighted his human desires. If he could resist my blood, drink of me and stop, then surely my body was an easy obstacle to over come. I felt anger and pain over come me as I though about how he had called me immature and childish. Is that why he had left me out of the decision making process? Did he not think I was intelligent, or experienced enough to make serious rational decisions? Did he really think so low of me? I heard someone at the door and froze. _Please don't be Edward,_ I thought with a twinge of panic.

I made my way out of my room and down the stairs. I paused as I reached the door. I didn't have to answer it. I could simply find out who it was and send them away.

"Who is it?"

"It's Alice. How are you?"

I sighed with relief. Alice good. I was in no mood to see anyone though. "Alice I'm fine. I don't feel up to company right now. I just want to rest. Thanks for coming."

"Bella are you okay?" She sounded concerned. I felt like an idiot talking through the door, but the last thing I needed was her seeing how I looked and passing that image on to Edward. I had been crying for most of the day and knew I looked like hell.

"I'm fine really Alice. I just need to be alone right now. I'm just really tired. Please." I was pleading with her to just understand and leave.

"Okay Bella. If you need anything call."

I sighed, "Of course. Thanks."

I returned to my room and lay on my bed. I knew Charlie would be home soon, but I wasn't hungry and didn't feel like making dinner. He could survive one night on his own. I wrapped myself up in my blankets hoping sleep would come. The next think I knew someone was gently shaking my shoulder. I opened my eyes and noticed it was dark outside so I must have been sleeping for hours. I looked at the person who had wakened me, it was Charlie and he was not alone. I was startled to see Carlisle's worried face looking at me from the doorway of my room.

"Dad. What?" is all I managed to get out.

"Honey, Dr. Cullen is here to check on you. He heard that you were sick and he wants to make sure that you're ok." I could tell Charlie was upset.

I closed my eyes in frustration. I was fine. Why won't people just leave me alone? I opened my eyes cautiously and took one more look at my father's concerned face and gave in. It's the least I can do for Charlie.

"Ok. Dad could you leave us please?"

"I will be right downstairs if you need me Bells." With that Charlie left the room closing the door behind him.

I gradually sat up on my bed looking at Carlisle. He smiled at me and I could see he was anxious.

"Well Bella I hear you aren't feeling too well. Why don't you tell me what's going on?"

I could sense he was referring to more than just my health, and I wondered what he had been told.

"I'm fine really. I was just really tired this morning and my head hurt so I decided to stay home and rest. You didn't need to come here. I'm sorry you wasted your time." I frowned upset that Carlisle was now involved.

"Well to be on the safe side I would like to draw some blood and do a quick exam if you don't mind."

"Really there is no need. I'm fine. I'm sure in a couple days I will be as good as new." I tried to sound convincing but Carlisle didn't seem swayed.

"Bella please I am the one who is a doctor here. I will be the one to determine if you are fine or not." He smiled at me and gave me a stern look.

"Carlisle please." I could feel my eyes filling with tears. I dropped my head in my hands as I tried to control my emotions unsuccessfully. Carlisle was instantly at my side putting his cold arms around me. It was amazingly comforting. Once I had regained my composure I smiled up at him. "Thanks." I said weakly.

"Oh Bella. There is no need to thank me. I have done nothing. Let me at least take your blood and run some tests. It will make _me_ feel better. I will write you a doctor's note excusing you from school for the next few days. You have to promise me that you will call me if there is a change or if you need anything, understood?" He looked at me as any father would look at their child when demanding conformity.

"Yes of course Carlisle." My voice seethed with gratitude. "Thank you so much." He quickly drew my blood as I lay down on my bed trying to distract myself so I wouldn't get sick. He turned to leave but paused as he reached the door.

"Bella, I don't know what's going on between you and Edward, frankly it's none of my business. If you need anything, and I do mean anything, do not hesitate to ask. You are family now too and we Cullen's stick together." He hesitated briefly before he continued as if he wasn't sure about what he was about to say. "Do you have any messages…for anyone…before I go?" I knew whom he meant. I thought for a minute and went to my desk and pulled out a piece of paper and a pen. I quickly jotted something down folding the paper and handed it to Carlisle. My note was simple and to the point.

_Edward,_

_I know you are hurting right now, but please understand that I need time. When I am ready to talk I will come to __**you**__. Until then __**please**__ give me the space I need. Do not call, or come over to watch me sleep. If you fear for my safety you may watch over me from the outside of my house. _

Love 

_Bella _

"Thanks again." I wrapped my arms around Carlisle's waist and hugged him. He returned my hug and smiled at me as he left my room. I walked back to my bed eager to sleep again. Although I had slept for most of the day I felt exhausted and was grateful as sleep quickly found me.


	4. Chapter 4

Again- the characters do not belong to me. They belong to Stephenie Meyer

E- POV

I became instantly alert as I heard Carlisle's Mercedes come up the driveway. I made my way down stairs quickly and met him at the door.

"How is she? Is she okay?" I asked anxiously.

"She is going to be fine. I drew some blood to run some tests. I will tell you what I told her. I do not know what is going on between you two, frankly it's none of my business. What I do know is that she is hurting a lot. I have excused her from school for the next few days." He handed me a piece of paper and left me alone. I stared down at the paper in my hand, unwilling to open it. I was relieved to find out that she was going to be okay, but stunned by the image of Bella in Carlisle's mind. I watched as he held her as she cried and comforted her. She looked so tired and wounded. I hated myself for making her cry. She looked broken. I winced as more images flooded my head of her lying on her bed helplessly.

I ran outside to be alone away from the thoughts of my family. Half way into the forest I stopped staring at the letter Carlisle had given me. I was afraid to open it. I was terrified of what it would say. Eventually I took a deep breath and gingerly opened the letter.

_Edward,_

_I know you are hurting right now, but please understand that I need time. When I am ready to talk I will come to __**you**__. Until then __**please**__ give me the space I need. Do not call, or come over to watch me sleep. If you fear for my safety you may watch over me from the outside of my house. _

Love 

_Bella _

I read and re-read the letter several times letting each word sink in. She needed time. I could handle that. She still loved me and that gave me hope. I started to run again not sure of where I was going. I found myself at Bella's house. All was quite and her light was off. I sat there all night staring at her window longing to enter and be near my angel. I missed her so much. It was torture to be parted from her like this, but I would not go against her wishes. I would watch over her here outside until she was ready to talk. I would wait forever if I had to.


	5. Chapter 5

Do not own the characters - Stephenie Meyer does!

The following days were better. I was able to get control of my emotions and was finally ready to see Edward. I was nervous and anxious to see him. We hadn't talked in two days and I missed him a lot. I needed to be firm and tell him how I felt no matter how much it was going to hurt him. It wasn't ok for him to treat me as a child. If this relationship was going to work he needed to see me as his equal.

I walked to my truck and shut the door taking a deep breath as I turned the key in the ignition. I can so this, I kept chanting to myself the entire ride over to the Cullen's. As I approached the house I started to feel sick to my stomach. My hands were shaking and I almost chickened out. I looked down grasping the steering wheel tightly and took a few deep breaths to calm myself. Slowly I opened my eyes and exited my truck. I made my way to the front door and hesitated before I opened it. Maybe he wasn't home? I should have called first. Even if he wasn't home I could just wait in his room for him to show up.

I gingerly opened the front door and made my way to Edward's room, seemingly undetected. Either no one was home, or they were ignoring me. As I got closer to his room my breathing came faster. Suddenly I felt a calm come over me, Jasper must be home. I shook my head, secretly glad for the peaceful feeling filling my body.

I heard music coming from Edward's room and knew he was home. I knocked on his door waiting for him to answer. I didn't have to wait long. Within seconds he was standing before me. We stared at each other saying nothing. A few moments later Edward stepped aside-allowing me entrance to his room. I walked to his couch to sit, but decided I was much too nervous to sit still. I could feel his eyes on me as I paced around his room. He quietly made his was to his couch and sat down folding his hands in front of him. I didn't know how to start and I felt sick. I longed to have the calm feeling back Jasper had supplied me with earlier.

"Bella I…" I shot my hand up and turned to look at him silencing him. I needed to go first before I lost my nerve. Edward looked at me with pain filled eyes and nodded in agreement. I started passing again, biting the nails on my left hand. I could feel my hands starting to shake and I crossed my arms across my chest to hide them from Edward. I took a deep breath squaring my shoulders and went to the couch to it next to him. I kept my head down, jiggling my leg out of anticipation.

"Edward." He turned to me then listening intently to my every word.

I started biting my nails again afraid to meet his gaze. I just needed to do this now and swiftly.

"That night, well you hurt me." The words flowed quickly and effortlessly once I got that first sentence out. "I felt like you were treating me like a child not your partner. The way you looked at me and talked to me, I never want to feel like that again. I heard what you mumbled to yourself, well parts of what you mumbled. I heard you say that I was immature and childish. You have no idea how that stung and hurt me. I am sorry that I am weak and human. I just love you so much and want to be close to you. I know you have your boundaries, but Edward they are _your_ boundaries not mine. Do you really not respect my opinion enough to ask how I feel about things? Do you really see me as just an immature childish little girl?" My voice broke then and I had to take a deep breath before I could continue.

"You can't make decisions about our relationship without me! You are not the only one in this relationship. If this is going to work then you have to trust me and treat me as your equal not a child. I don't want to ever feel like this again." I whispered. I looked up at him and saw anguish, and dismay in his eyes. I knew my words had hurt him but I had to tell him how I felt. It wasn't fair for me to hurt to protect him from pain.

He reached out and put one of his hands on my face and looked into my eyes.

"Bella I am so sorry." His voice seethed with sincerity. It looked like if he could cry he would be. "I never meant to hurt you. I loathe myself for the pain I have caused you. Please know that I was never really mad at you. I was upset with myself, and my weaknesses not yours. I know I was rough with you that night and talked to you harshly, and for that I apologize. It was uncalled for and unforgivable. I give you my word that I shall never speak to you like that again. I was frustrated with myself and took that frustration out on you. I am so sorry." I raised my hand up to my face resting it on his. He smiled weakly as he continued.

"I do not see you as a child. You are my partner in everyway. I love you. You are my best friend, my soul mate, my everything. These past few days have been hell without you, nothing I did not deserve. I respect your opinion above all others. What you think and feel mean more to me than anything. You are a beautiful intelligent women whom I love above all else. Please say that you can forgive me for what I have done?"

I suddenly felt tears silently flowing down my face. I didn't even know that I was crying. I stared into his eyes. I so wanted to forgive him, but I had to know that he would include me in all the decision-making before I could excuse him.

"Do you promise to treat me as your equal? Do you promise to include me in all the decision making from now on?" I asked pleadingly.

"I promise." His face was very somber and I could see the earnestness in his eyes.

"Okay, I forgive you."

He reached his other hand out to hold my face in his hands and smiled down at me. I smiled back filled with tranquility and contentment to be close to him again. He leaned into me pressing his lips to mine. Electricity flowed between us as the kiss intensified. I raised my arms to wrap them around his neck and pull myself closer to him. My breathing was coming in short gasps but I refused to let go. Just before I was about to faint he gently pushed me away. He picked me up into his arms and set me down on his lap. I laid my head against his chest waiting for my breathing to slow.

I looked up at Edward to see him smiling mischievously at me.

"What?" I asked quizzically.

"So about _my_ boundaries, what exactly did you want to discuss?"

I blushed deep red and buried my head in his chest. "Well I just think that we should discuss where the lines should be drawn."

"Okay. Where do you think the lines should be drawn?" He was ginning wickedly at me.

"Well I mean you told me that your vampire desires are stronger and more powerful than your human desires so….I mean…I was just thinking….well…if you could resist my blood and drink of me without losing control….resisting my body shouldn't be that hard." I felt my face burn and couldn't make myself meet his gaze.

He put one finger under my chin and raised my face so that he could look into my eyes. His face was filled with love and his eyes were kind.

"Bella you underestimate the power your body has over me. You are a very beautiful and sexy women." I didn't think it was possible but I blushed even deeper. "It's not that I don't want you Bella, believe me there is _nothing_ I want more." His eyes were full of lust and desire as he continued. "You are just so fragile. I could never forgive myself if I were to hurt you. I have to mind my every action when I am with you. If for one second I forgot and lost control…" He looked away from me then, but not before I saw the pain on his face.

"I do understand how careful you have to be. But I trust you Edward completely. I trust you with my life. I know you would never hurt me. We could try at least. If it became too much for you we can stop."

He turned to me and smiled raising his eyebrows, "What exactly did you want to try?" He said seductively.


	6. Chapter 6

Again own nothing all belongs to Stephenie Meyer

"Uh, well…you…I mean…I want…umm…we could…" I felt Edward's body trembling around me as he started to shake with laughter. "Edward!" My entire neck and face were blazing. I crossed my arms in front of me annoyed that he was taking such pleasure in my discomfort. Try what, in deed! I glared up at him only making him laugh harder. I struggled to release my self from his hold with no avail.

"Let go of me! I have to get home before Charlie notices I am missing. I'm supposed to be sick remember?" I spat at him. I felt him gradually loosen his hold on me and I stomped my way to his door keeping my arms crossed in front of me. I stopped as I reached for the handle without turning around and demanded, "Are you coming or not?"

"Yes, mame." I could hear the smile in his voice. It only made me angrier. As I left his room I felt his strong arms encircle my waist. I was too annoyed with him to enjoy his touch.

"Hands off the merchandise! And _I_ will be driving." I heard him chuckling behind me as we walked through the hallway. I caught a glimpse of Jasper reading in his room; he smiled at us as we walked by. I heard him yell out to Edward, "Hey Edward, what did you do this time? She's _really_ angry."

"Hmpf!" Was the only response I could manage as we made our way down the stairs and out to my truck. I stomped my way to the driver's side door without looking back. I hastily opened my door slamming it shut behind me and started my truck. As soon as I heard Edward shut his door I took off. I was fuming in my seat. I was so annoyed. No one likes to be the butt of a joke, and that's what I felt I was. We didn't talk once the entire ride to my house. I could feel his eyes on me the whole time and I felt my anger dissipating. I sighed deeply as I turned my truck off and turned to look at Edward. He was smiling at me clearly enjoying my tantrum.

"What?" I tried to sound angry but failed miserably.

He leaned over and carefully placed his hands on either side of my face lowering his face so that we were eye to eye. He gently blew his sweat breath in my face stunning me. He was such a cheater!

"You look so beautiful when you are mad, and that blush on your cheeks" He raised one eyebrow and smiled, "is mouth watering." Of course, as if on cue, I blushed causing him to laugh.

My anger returned and I inquired, "Do you really take such pleasure in my discomfort?"

"Bella, please don't be cross with me. I'm not laughing at you. I do however, take great pleasure in watching you blush, that I will _not_ apologize for." He leaned down to rest his forehead against mine as he continue seductively, "You have no idea what that does to me." I blushed deeper and sighed.

"Let's go inside before Charlie comes home."

"As you wish." He smiled my favorite smile and released me from his hold. He was opening my door for me before I had my seat belt off. We walked hand in hand to the front door and made our way to the living room couch. We sat down next to each other silently.

"You know Carlisle excused me from school for another day." I bit down on my lip as I looked up at him. "I don't think I will be feeling well at all tomorrow and will need the day off. How are you feeling?" I smiled up at him suggestively.

He chucked silently at my not so subtle hint. "I am feeling a little sick myself. You must be contagious. Maybe we could be sick together, that way we can take care of each other."

I smiled at him overjoyed with the prospect of spending the entire day alone with him, but I couldn't escape reality.

"I was hoping that someone could get my homework for me so that I could catch up…do you think Alice would be willing to do that for me?"

He wrapped his arms around me pulling me to his chest. "I think that can be arranged." We sat holding each other until I heard Charlie pull into the driveway. I tensed realizing that Charlie should not see Edward here. "Edward"

"I'll be in your room waiting." With that I felt a cool unnatural breeze and he was gone.

I lay down on the couch abruptly feeling exhausted from my day. It had been a very emotionally draining day and I was looking forward to sleeping. I heard Charlie enter the house, kicking off his boots before he entered the living room to check on me.

"How are you feeling Bells?" He sounded concerned. Maybe I looked as tired as I felt.

"Tired." I answered honestly.

"Have you heard anything from Dr. Cullen yet? Maybe you should call and see if he found anything in your blood work?" I had forgotten that Carlisle was running tests on my blood. I really didn't feel like getting up, but I knew it would make Charlie feel better so I slowly made my way to the phone.

"Dr. Cullen."

"Hey Dr. Cullen its Bella. I was just wondering if you got the results back on my blood work yet?"

"Yes. I have. How are you feeling? Is everything okay?" He sounded anxious and I started to worry that he had found something wrong after all.

"I'm fine. Just tired. What were the results?"

"Bella." I could hear his tone change from being anxious to stern. "I want you to tell me when the last time was that you ate."

I hesitated. I honestly couldn't remember. I felt myself blush as I tried to recall when I had my last meal.

"That's what I thought. You're blood sugar was very low."

"Sorry. I guess the last time I ate was lunch the night before you came to see me." I was looking at Charlie as I confessed everything to Carlisle. He looked shocked and upset by my confession. I smiled sheepishly at him as he frowned at me.

"Bella you need to eat better. You are going to make yourself seriously sick. Promise me that you will do your best to eat at least three meals a day?" He asked sounding worried.

"I promise. Sorry, and thanks for everything."

"Take care of yourself, and eat a good meal tonight since you have yet to eat today." His voice seethed with disapproval and I quickly said my goodbyes and hung up.

"Dad…I…I just haven't been hungry. The good news is that Carlisle found nothing serious wrong with me." I quickly added. I could see he was angry with me and worried. "I promise to eat better and I will eat a good meal tonight." I had planned on skipping dinner. I was excited to get back to Edward, but he would have to wait.

"Bella you need to eat. What were you thinking? I mean you are 18 years old. Do I need to start monitoring what you eat?"

"No." I sounded angry and took a deep breath to calm myself. "Dad I am sorry really. I promise to do better. Now what do you want to eat? I'm starving." We hurried through our dinner talking as little as possible.

"Dad I think I'm going to go to bed now. I am really tired and need to rest."

"Okay Bella, I will finish cleaning up here. Get better honey and sleep well."

"Thanks dad. I love you. Goodnight." I was eager to get to my room where I knew Edward was waiting for me.


	7. Chapter 7

Again own nothing all belongs to Stephenie Meyer

The relief that filled my body as I heard her agree to forgive me was over whelming. I had my angel back. I couldn't resist kissing her and feeling her soft plump lips on mine. As the kiss progressed something she said hit me. She had stated that she wasn't happy with our physical relationship. Of course, I knew that already. She was constantly pushing the boundaries I had carefully set to keep her safe, but I always thought it was because she got caught up in the moment. Now I knew she consciously wanted more. I could have fun with this…

As our kiss ended I picked her up holding her in my arms and cradled her to my chest. I looked down at her with a twinkle in my eye knowing what my next question would do to her. She seemed to catch my expression and was inquisitive to its origin.

"So about _my_ boundaries, what exactly did you want to discuss?" As I had hoped she turned a luscious shade of red. It was intoxicating. I could hear the hesitation in her voice as she answered my question. I tried to remain calm as I asked where she thought our boundaries should be, knowing it would only fluster her further and hopefully increase her blush. I was not disappointed. She ducked her head in embarrassment. She was so sweet, innocent, and pure.

I gently lifted her face with one of my finger so that I could look deep into her eyes. She had thought that her body was easy for me to resist. If only she knew! If only she knew how much control and power her body had over me. Many nights I found myself also wishing that things were different. I wanted to be close to her, I wanted to feel her touch on my skin, caress her secret places. I wanted so badly to lose myself in her, but I just couldn't. She was so fragile and I couldn't take the risk. I tried to convey my feelings to her and became discussed with myself. I was a monster who couldn't even be close to the one he loved. I turned away from her in discuss.

Her response surprised me. She knew the dangers but still trusted me. I only wish I could trust myself. She wanted to try…try what? My Bella was asking me for what exactly? Where was she going with this? Try…I had to know and I decided to dazzle it out of her if I could.

I turned to her and smiled raising my eyebrows, "What exactly did you want to try?"

She was completely uncomfortable with my question. She could barley put her thoughts together and I couldn't hold my amusement in any longer. She was not pleased with my reaction and tried to get up from my lap. I was not going to allow that so I held her tighter.

She was not pleased and narrowed her eyes at me before crying angrily, "Let go of me! I have to get home before Charlie notices I am missing. I'm supposed to be sick remember?" She was so beautiful when she was angry. Reluctantly I loosened my grip on her, and watched as she stomped her way to my door. I was not about to let her leave without me, but before I could protest she irritably asked if I would join her. I should have kept better control over my emotions. I just couldn't help smiling at her reaction. She was obviously very upset but still wanted to be with me, so it couldn't be that bad.

As we walked down the hall I wrapped my arms around her unable to resist the feel of her skin any longer. Oh how I had missed her warmth these past few days. If only she could know how miserable I had been. She was too angry with me to allow me to hold her so I let her go reluctantly.

Just then I caught Jasper's thoughts. _Bella is_ _fuming! I thought Edward and Bella just made up? What the hell did he do this time? Whatever it is he better apologize! I don't want to deal with his depression again._ I glared at Jasper as we passed his room, just as he yelled, "Hey Edward, what did you do this time? She's _really_ angry." I growled softly at his question. I would deal with him later.

Bella wouldn't look at me the entire drive. I watched as her body slowly relaxed the closer we got to her house. I couldn't keep my eyes off her, and smiled hugely. She was my angel. She was not happy with my expression when she finally turned to look at me, and she thought I was poking fun at her. How could she think such a think? I was simply over-joyed to be in her presence again.

I looked deep into her eyes before I said, "Bella, please don't be cross with me. I'm not laughing at you. I do however, take great pleasure in watching you blush, that I will _not_ apologize for." I leaned my forehead down to meet hers and continued seductively, "You have no idea what that does to me." She turned a beautiful shade of red and sighed sending a wave of her scent towards me. I was forgiven.

We walked into her house together and sat on the couch. I could tell there was something she wanted to discuss with me, and I wondered if she was going to tell me what she wanted to 'try' after all. She seemed nervous and she was biting her bottom lip. I loved it when she would do that. It was quite alluring.

To my surprise and enjoyment she wanted to spend the day alone with me tomorrow.   
I would not disappoint her. I did not want to be parted from her ever again. Before I had time to kiss her again I heard Charlie pull into the driveway. I took one last look at my angel before disappearing to her room.

As I got settled on her bed, drowning my self in her scent, I was alarmed by the conversation going on downstairs. I shot up quickly listening attentively. Bella had not eaten in how long? What was she thinking? She needed to eat, she didn't have anything to spare she was so thin already. Anger filled my body. I was appalled with myself. If I hadn't been a total ass then she would never have starved herself. It was my entire fault. I would have to keep a better eye on her and make sure she did not skip any meals from now on. I would have to check with Carlisle to see what he had found exactly in her blood work. I could hear Charlie reprimanding her. He was right I had to admit. She was 18, she did know better! I couldn't lose her. She needed to take better care of herself. She was more fragile than she understood. What was she thinking?!? Just then I heard the door open pulling me from my thoughts, and there before me stood my angel.


	8. Chapter 8

I readily opened my door and found Edward sitting on my bed. As I approached him I abruptly stopped taking in Edward's face for the first time. His face was filled with concern and disapproval. I grimaced as he opened his mouth to speak. I knew what he was going to say. He was going to lecture me about taking care of myself and eating better just as Charlie and Carlisle had done earlier, again treating me like a child. I didn't want to have this conversation again. Two father figures lecturing me were enough. I knew it would lead to an argument and I was too exhausted for one tonight.

I swiftly put my hand up motioning for him to stop. "Edward I don't want to fight." I took a deep breath and let it out slowly as my head and shoulders slumped whispering, "I just don't want to fight."

"Bella" his voice was stern and concerned. I kept my head down waiting for him to continue, as I stood frozen in the middle of my room.

"I just don't want to lose you. Promise to take better care of yourself, for me?" I chanced a glance at his face and his eyes were pleading for me to comply. I said nothing for a long time, lost in his gaze. I watched as his features turned to displeasure and he began to frown becoming impatient with me.

"Please Bella?" I still said nothing dropping my eyes and playing with a stray piece of my hair. It's not that I didn't want to answer. I just didn't want to talk about it.

"Promise me!" He said through clenched teeth. Edward's voice was forceful and laced with anger. I snapped my head up hearing his tone, taken aback.

"Fine." I retorted. "Can we drop it now?" I asked annoyed. He simply nodded his head in agreement and I watched as his features slowly became relaxed again. I smiled weakly at him before I turned for my door. Before I had taken one full step I felt Edward's arms encircle my waist, and bury his face in my hair. He inhaled deeply taking in my scent.

"Where do you think you're going?"

"I need to take a shower and change. Don't worry I'll be back soon." I turned around to face him placing my left hand softly on his face and smiled. He let go of me and gestured with one of his hands for me to continue. I grabbed some clothes and my bag of toiletries as I left my room for the bathroom.

I stood in the shower letting the water flow over me as my mind mulled over the events of the day. So much had happened today. Edward and I had finally worked things out and he was in my room now waiting for me. I could feel my muscles relax as I let that thought sink in. Edward was back. He was finally going to treat me as an equal, and include me in all decision making. Suddenly I gasped realizing the implications of what that meant. I could feel my face flush and my heart rate increase. We had never really decided in what boundaries to set. Was he going to bring it up tonight? Was I ready for such a conversation? Should I wait for him to bring it up or should I?

I quickly shut off the water flustered and upset. I wanted new boundaries. I needed knew boundaries, but how should I approach the subject? I mulled over what I should do as I dried myself off and got dressed. As I finished brushing my hair I decided to wait and see if he brought it up again tonight. If he did, great, if not I would bring it up tomorrow.

As I entered my room I couldn't help but blush as I saw Edward lying sideways on my bed facing me. I smiled and quickly made my way to his side. As I sat down he pulled me close to him softly kissing my back. The feel of his lips made me shudder. I yawned involuntarily, and I tried to hide it from Edward. I felt him smile into my back.

"Bedtime for the human."

"Really I'm ok. I don't want to sleep yet." I said as I turned my body to look at him.

He smiled gently and sighed, "We have all day tomorrow together. You have had a long day. You need your rest."

"Fine." I grumbled as I slid under my covers.

"Edward?"

"Yes." He whispered as he buried his face in the crook of my neck, his arms wrapped securely around me.

I hesitated briefly and could feel myself flush at what I was about to ask. Even though he couldn't see me blush I knew he felt it, causing my blush to deepen. "We'll talk tomorrow right?"

"We'll talk about anything you wish." He stated simply. Content with his answer I sighed and drifted off to sleep excited for what the next day would bring.


	9. Chapter 9

All belongs to Mrs. Meyer's. I own nothing.

I groaned softly as light started to filter into my room from my window. I didn't remember the last time I had slept so well. I quickly grabbed my pillow and placed it over my head willing for more sleep to come. That's when I heard an angelic laugh coming from somewhere in my room.

"Not funny." I croaked lifting the pillow from my face and threw it in the general direction of the laughter.

"Good morning." I opened my eyes lifting my head to find Edward sitting in the rocking chair smiling hugely. Of course my pillow hadn't even come close to hitting him.

"Ten more minutes." I muttered as I laid my head back down covering my face with my arms. Just as my head hit the bed I felt airborne. Edward had grabbed me and thrown me over his shoulder. I was too shocked to respond and I could feel him laughing under me.

"Time for breakfast." He said cheerfully. He bounded down the stairs and gently placed me in one of the kitchen chairs smiling at my expression.

"What would you like?"

"Cereal please." I was starting to wake up and my mood was improving remembering that Edward and I had the entire day to ourselves.

"What time is it?" I asked stretching my arms over my head.

"It's 9:30"

"Wow. That late." I was surprised I had slept in for so long, and that Edward was patient enough to not wake me up.

"Eat." Edward commanded as he placed a bowl of my favorite cereal in front of me. I smiled up at him thanking him and began eating happily. Edward sat across the table from me smiling watching me devour my breakfast. I still made me feel weird to have him watch me eat, so I decided to distract him.

"So what do you want to do today?" I inquired. I was up for anything as long as he was by my side.

"Well…since we are sick I thought we would stay here today, watch movies, and talk."

His last suggestion made me blush. Ti reminded me of the conversation we had yet to finish concerning boundaries. I quickly looked down trying to hide my face. When I thought it was safe to look up again I say him staring at me with humor filled eyes. He saw. I swiftly finished my breakfast and headed upstairs to get ready for he day as Edward cleaned my breakfast dishes.

I raced down the stairs tripping on the last step. Just as I was about to hit the floor two strong arms grabbed me stopping me. I looked up and smiled apologetically at Edward. He shook his head and closed his eyes. He sighed deeply "What am I going to do with you?"

He carried me to the couch and set me on his lap. I was starting to get anxious knowing he was going to start soon. There was a lot left unanswered yesterday and I knew it was driving him crazy. Edward always had to know everything. I began biting the nails on my right hand in anticipation.

"Bella I need to ask you something." He murmured softly. "I don't want you to get upset with me but I need to know. Why had you stopped eating? Why did you need be away for so long?"

I lifted my head to look into his eyes finding sadness and unease within. "I didn't do it on purpose Edward. I just wasn't hungry. I was so upset and…well…hurt. I just felt nauseas and couldn't eat. The only escape I found was sleep." I willed him with my eyes to understand and not blame himself. He was frowning and looked miserable. I tried to comfort him and continued, "Please it's not your fault. I chose not to eat. It was my choice and I promise to never do it again." I placed one of my hands on the side of his face to ease his pain. I felt his face soften under my touch but the sadness was still in his eyes.

"I stayed away for so long because I needed time to think. I wanted a chance to organize my thoughts so that I could rationally discuss the problem with you. I'm sorry if I hurt you. I never meant to. I…"

"Isabella Marie Swan." He stated cutting me off. "Do _not_ apologize to me for needing time to think things through. I deserved far worse than what I got. I hurt you deeply and will never forgive myself for the tears I have caused you to cry." He sounded angry, but I knew it was directed inward. He turned his head form me hiding his face. "You deserve better than me." He whispered.

"Edward, look at me." I said gently. I waited patiently; soon it became clear he was not going to listen to me. I placed my hands on either side of his face trying to turn his head, but he refused to budge. "Look at me!" I said forcefully. Sighing he turned his head to me. I looked deep into his eyes trying to convey all the love I felt for him.

"You are exactly what I deserve. You are all I will ever need or want. We just had an argument. All couples do. We are in this fifty-fifty forever."

He grabbed one of my hands from off his face and raised it to his mouth lightly kissing my wrist. He intertwined his fingers with mine dropping our hands into my lap. He looked down at our hands wrapped together saying nothing for a long time. I began to gently caress his face waiting for him to speak.

"Bella I never meant to treat you as anything less than my equal. I am just so scared of loosing you that I sometimes become a little over protective." He looked dup at me and smiled apologetically and continued, "I will try my best to always consult you with decisions concerning the two of us from now on. I love you Bella, forever."

"That's all I'm asking." I whispered as I lifted my chin to place my lips to his. This kiss started out innocent, but rapidly I felt Edward un-twine our hands and place his right hand on my back with his other laid gently on the back of my head pulling me closer deepening the kiss. I was hesitant to respond. This is exactly what started the fight all those nights ago. As he grew more impatient waiting for me to reciprocate I lost all control and soon found myself lilting my arms wrapping them around his neck. To my surprise he did not pull back. I crushed my body against his as he gently laid us back on the couch with me on top of him. Our breathing had turned to panting as our lips moved urgently against each other. I felt his hands on my back as one slipped gently under my shirt and caressed my skin. I gasped and pulled away shocked by his touch. This was definitely not within the limits of his boundaries. I looked down at him to see him grinning seductively.

He shrugged his shoulders at me surprised expression. "You said you were not happy with _my _boundaries so I decided to try something new." He attempted to sound innocent but I could see the humor and desire in his eyes.

I tried to pull myself together. "I'm not complaining. I just wasn't expecting it, that's all." I blushed and buried my head in his chest. Why was this so hard to talk about?

He lovingly pulled my face from his chest to look into my eyes. "Bella what were you expecting? What do you want? Don't be embarrassed you can tell me anything."

Despite the comfort his words brought me I felt myself blush deeper as I answered his questions. "I want to be close to you. I want to be with you Edward." I whispered sadly. I knew it was impossible but my body ached to be with him.

"I know, and I'm sorry." He said soothingly. "I wish I could give you that Bella. I just don't see anyway that would involve you not getting hurt."

"I know. It's ok. I understand." I tried to keep the sadness out of my voice but failed.

"There are other things we can do though right? I mean just now you seemed ok."

"Yes there are other things we can do. I've just been scared to try anything beyond kissing for fear that I would lose control, and it would lead to something else and you would get hurt. There is nothing more in this world I fear more than hurting you."

"I trust you Edward. I know you would never hurt me." I said sternly trying to convince him of this fact. He chuckled humorlessly and sighed.

"So we could try more of what we just did. That seemed safe enough." I said quickly trying to distract him. I watched as his eyes lit up with humor and desire leaving all traces of sadness behind.

"Why Miss Swan are you trying to beguile me?"

"Yes I am. Is it working?" I said lightly.

He looked deep into my eyes for a long moment before he tilted his head to mine. Just before our lips met he whispered, "Always."

We spent the better part of the afternoon exploring each other, redefining our boundaries as we went along. It was one the most blissful afternoons of my life.

A/N I was thinking of ending it here. What do you think? Ideas on how I should continue? Should I continue?


	10. Chapter 10

A/N

Ok so you all want me to continue but I really don't know where to take the story. If you want more I need ideas. If I get any ideas that inspire me I will write more I promise!

I am currently working on a story that is an AU: What if Edward followed Bella home the first day of school and did not refuse the monster within? What would life be like then? I am really excited to write this story!


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